"I Got Super Bowl Tickets, But You Won't Touch My Junk": The Police State Super Bowl

Signs of the American Police State will be on display for every ticket holder to feel. The Fourth Amendment killing Department of Homeland Security, which will soon be fueled by a permanent extension of the Patriot Act (thanks to DeceptiCON Republicans who are promising to follow the Constitution but aren't), will be working with law enforcement agencies, subjecting all ticket holders entering Cowboy Stadium for Super Bowl 45 to a junk touching, groping.

Everyone entering the stadium must pass through a magnatometer, such as those used at airports, and get a patdown as part of the screening process. The majority of fans will enter through checkpoints on the east side of Cowboys Stadium.

Small bags are allowed, but will be searched, and jackets will be X-rayed.
Not allowed
Items fans can't bring into Cowboys Stadium:
Weapons, mace/pepper spray, fireworks
Camcorders, tripods, camera cases and binocular cases
Umbrellas, strollers
Grills, tents, poles, sticks
Banners, noisemakers, horns, beach balls, Frisbees, laser lights and pointers
Containers of any type, coolers of any size, backpacks
Bottles, cans, hairspray


So not only are we starting to see the groping that is going on at airports taking place just to enter the Super Bowl, they are also brining their x-ray equipment. Want to bet Super Bowl 46 next year includes naked body scanners?

Wasn't this the same government that after 9/11 that told us if we change our way of lives for the terrorists after these attacks the terrorists win.

Well it appears to me no matter which team comes out on top today, the Pittsburgh Steelers or the Green Bay Packers, it's the terrorists who really win Super Bowl 45.

Score prediction: Terrorists 56 American Civil Rights 0